unfollowing me wont help you lose your virginity
Pros of wearing all black: looks so badass
Cons: everyone knows I had powdered donuts
I think I may be gayer than originally planned
I just wanna have abs…olutely all the pasta and breadsticks
fuckboy and lava girl
job interviewer: so…tell me a little about yourself :)
me: sure. i’m a virgo, INTJ, i love tank tops oh my god did you see the Anaconda video? that changed my life!
interviewer: bitch me too! the fuck. you got the job
Half of me is really attracted to super femme girls
and half of me is attracted to girls in snapbacks and cut offs.
schools have stairs so you can throw yourselves down them
in case it hasn’t hit you yet: Tiana is the first Disney Princess from America.
I can paint with all the colors of your ignorance
*goes to bed at 2am instead of 5am* wow, my life is so in order right now. i’m making such good decisions for myself and my body and my soul and im so in love with myself for doing this
Me like every night
- Cop: Have you been drinking?
- Me: I been drankin'
- Cop: Surfbort
- Me: Surfbort